Parker 1, Mommy 0

Today my three year-old put me in my place, but in order to give you an accurate perception of what occurred, I will have to give you some background.

Parker didn't sleep well yesterday night. And yesterday morning he woke up at 6:30 saying his neck hurt. If there's one thing you should know about Parker, it's that although he is only three, he acts like a teenager - he knows if he is sick he can get out of anything. Eric and I both thought he just didn't want to go to school (day care) and was pretending. Then we looked at his neck - he has a giant (and I mean GIANT - it's the size of a golf ball) bump on his neck, right where the jawbone meets your ear.

Eric and I both think that it's a swollen lymph node, so we decide to take him with us to the office, and set up an appointment to see the pediatrician. At the doctor's office later that morning they take a strep test - negative. There not sure what he is sick with, and he is now acting like an angel so they can't even see that he obviously doesn't feel good. The doctor puts him on antibiotics thinking he has a virus and once he's done with the antibiotics, the lymph node will go down.

(Antibiotics bring up a whole new situation! Parker and I are both allergic to amoxicillin. Well Parker is in day care two days a week - he's constantly getting sick, which means he's constantly on some type of antibiotic. Amoxicillin is like two bucks after insurance, but of course he can't take it, so we always get some crazy kind of medicine that I have never heard of and even after they run the insurance we still end up paying fifty bucks! Come on! Can't there be a medicine in the middle - it really can't only be two bucks or fifty. I'd even be happy with twenty!!!!)

Back to the story.

My parents watched Parker and Preslie last night so we could go to the Dave Matthews Band concert with friends - AMAZING concert Thank you Stan and Jenn for being the best people in the world and inviting us! :) - and on our way home I start feeling gross. I woke up this morning feeling like someone had grated one side of my throat with sand paper all night long, and the other side has a huge snot ball I can't get out. (Gross I know, but now you know how I feel!)

So I feel gross, Parker feels gross, I'm trying not to get Preslie sick so I'm holding her as little as possible, and we are trying to get out the door to go and buy stamps. Technology is great these days and you can buy stamps at the ATM. So I'm telling Parker to get out the door, and he's screaming about how he has to have shoes on, I'm telling him he doesn't need them we will stay in the car, and Preslie is such a girl she's shrieking because she can tell everyone is upset.

Parker screams the whole way to and from the ATM and then things really hit the fan when we get home. He says he has to go "poopy" I told him to go on the potty, he says no in his diaper. We've been trying to get Parker potty trained (I really don't get why it is this hard) and so I'm frustrated, set him on the potty and say he can't get down until he goes.

He sits there for ten minutes - literally! I keep going in there every minute or so to ask him if he's gone, he always says "Yes." I ask him if he's lying, and he says "Yes." So I continue to let him sit there.

The whining once again has gotten out of control and whether it's the heat of the moment, or the heat of the 101 degree fever I have broken, I am red faced, upset, and shaking. I tell him "Parker you will sit there until you have gone potty, I don't care if it takes all day!"

Parker gets this truly stricken look on his face and says:
"Mommy, I wanna go Tampa."

That's what I thought he said at least. Tampa, and I'm thinking my brother-in-law on a mission there, he must want to go and see "Uncle Map"(Mat).

"What?"

"I wanna go stample"

"Parker, I don't know what you're saying."

By this time I'm so tired and delirious from being sick the last thing I want to do is pull out the translation guide to my three year-old who is deaf in one ear, and consequently doesn't ennunciate well.

"Mommy. I wanna go temple. I wanna go church, temple."

Smack to the face. I'm a horrible parent!

Needless to say it put things in perspective, and I was finally able to calmly strap on Parker's diaper, give him a hug and kiss and put him down for bed.

We teach Parker about church, and Jesus, he loves going to nursery. Unfortunately, we do not live in a part of town where we pass the temple every day, and can point it out to him and sing the song. So I can honestly say that his nursery leaders taught him about the temple and how it is a safe place to go when you are scared. . . . . even if that means your scared of Mommy.